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Jul 19, 2011
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if he were here today he could be with jon stewart, he could be anybody, he uld be with stephen colbert and meet them eye to eye. that he was funny. how often have w seen a polician like that? not in a long time. >> rose: how do you think president obama's doing on those standards? >> well, i think the one thing he did care about, lincoln, originally, the emotional intelligence set of issues, i think he does have those. when you watch him around a table he makes sure everybody speaks, h listens to people with opposing advice. i think the thing you ve to learn when you get into the presidency is that a certain point you can't listen anymore. lincoln finally said "consensus can be paralyzing, you have to decide when to act." >> rose: wow. >> so that everyone around a table, for example, he debated emancipation for two months, three months, and everybody had different points of view. don't do it, do it, do it yesterday. he finally decided i'm making my mind up and issuing the emancipation proclamation. he goes to the cabinet and says "i don't want your ideas. i've made up my mind. but i'll
if he were here today he could be with jon stewart, he could be anybody, he uld be with stephen colbert and meet them eye to eye. that he was funny. how often have w seen a polician like that? not in a long time. >> rose: how do you think president obama's doing on those standards? >> well, i think the one thing he did care about, lincoln, originally, the emotional intelligence set of issues, i think he does have those. when you watch him around a table he makes sure everybody...
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>> herman cain says comedian jon stewart was mocking him. >> here is an example of jon stewart's bias. >> jon stewart gets his view from the left but can't admit he's a liberal mouthpiece. >> herman cain on his feud with political sequester jon stewart. >> jon stewart breaks into his amos and andy routine to mock herman cain. >> jon stewart tries to disguise his true liberal bias. >> jon stewart says he's both liberal and he's fair. let's see how that's working out. >> jon: i guess everyone got the memo. [laughter] do you want to bring your whole network to the throwdown? you want to go channel 44 versus channel 45? obviously that's the channel configuration of time warner in the new york area, your local listings where comedy central and fox are would be more accurate. of course, hd is a completely different situation. my point is you don't think i have peeps? you don't think i roll deep? cc rolls deep, yo, yo, check this [bleeped] out. yeah, yeah, yeah. comedy central, get me krud mandoon. that's, mother... really? canceled? when was that canceled? he's our only guy with a sword, th
>> herman cain says comedian jon stewart was mocking him. >> here is an example of jon stewart's bias. >> jon stewart gets his view from the left but can't admit he's a liberal mouthpiece. >> herman cain on his feud with political sequester jon stewart. >> jon stewart breaks into his amos and andy routine to mock herman cain. >> jon stewart tries to disguise his true liberal bias. >> jon stewart says he's both liberal and he's fair. let's see how that's...
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captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. tonight jennifer aniston. jennifer aniston will be here. i hope i'm not too exhausted. i had a crazy weekend. yesterday likeyear in the end of june last weekend i dress in glitter like a peacock. i march down fifth avenue to raise awareness of exotic birds. and i've got to tell you this year almost more than any other year it went really really well. i couldn't believe the support i was getting. people are like this is a great day. it's been too long. i was like, yeah, exotic birds. you know what i mean? and then people are like wasn't friday amazing? i was like why? what happened friday?
captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. tonight jennifer aniston. jennifer aniston will be here. i hope i'm not too exhausted. i had a crazy weekend. yesterday likeyear in the end of june last weekend i dress in glitter like a peacock. i march down fifth avenue to raise awareness of exotic birds. and i've got to tell you this year almost more than any other year it went really really well. i couldn't believe the support i was...
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captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. tonight jennifer aniston. jennifer aniston will be here. i hope i'm not too exhausted. i had a crazy weekend. yesterday likeyear in the end of june last weekend i dress in glitter like a peacock. i march down fifth avenue to raise awareness of exotic birds. and i've got to tell you this year almost more than any other year it went really really well. i couldn't believe the support i was getting. people are like this is a great day. it's been too long. i was like, yeah, exotic birds. you know what i mean? and then people are like wasn't friday amazing? i was like why? what happened friday? >> it is a history-making night with a vote that just happened a short time ago. new york becomes the 7th jurisdiction in america to recognize marriage for same sex couples. >> jon: that's a major civil rights victory. ( cheers and applause ) new york, finally, new york state's gay and lesbian community are free from the burden that was having to set foot in connecticut in order to get married. ( app
captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. tonight jennifer aniston. jennifer aniston will be here. i hope i'm not too exhausted. i had a crazy weekend. yesterday likeyear in the end of june last weekend i dress in glitter like a peacock. i march down fifth avenue to raise awareness of exotic birds. and i've got to tell you this year almost more than any other year it went really really well. i couldn't believe the support i was...
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Jul 19, 2011
07/11
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my name is jon stewart. welcome to the daily show. my name is is jon stewart. good one tonight. our guest the young actor daniel radcliffe. as you probably heard he's the star of the new flick harry potter and the half billion dollars in worldwide weekend gross. so exciting tonight. i found out something scientifically i didn't know was possible. a canadian can breed with a german. ( cheers and applause ) did you know that? ( cheers and applause ) i don't even know how they fit them together. they've created a new species a canad-erman. you know what? no fooling around. our top story tonight, of course, the debt ceiling and our ongoing segment. that is in no way hyperbolic. as america moves closer to just laying out a blanket in front of our garage and selling off all our old board games it has become clear that time for action is short. >> the president says he wants an agreement. >> president obama set a deadline. >> president obama now says it's decision time. >> jon: oh, snap, commander in chief. throwing down a deadline. on friday the president of the united states broke ou
my name is jon stewart. welcome to the daily show. my name is is jon stewart. good one tonight. our guest the young actor daniel radcliffe. as you probably heard he's the star of the new flick harry potter and the half billion dollars in worldwide weekend gross. so exciting tonight. i found out something scientifically i didn't know was possible. a canadian can breed with a german. ( cheers and applause ) did you know that? ( cheers and applause ) i don't even know how they fit them together....
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[laughter] >> jon: jon stewart, "the daily show." i have a quick question. as a frequent radioshack customer, i may be qualified to tell you what may be an issue with your plan, but go ahead. >> the problem with it was the limited battery life. [laughter and applause] >> jon: see, the batteries at radioshack are designed to work with one of those little remote control helicopters that work... once. [laughter] so now that we know the g.p.s. tracking system for the assault rifles we sold mexican cartels didn't work, how do we find out where the guns are? what is plan "b"? >> the only way you're going to find those guns in mexico is where? >> at crime scenes in which either the bad guy was killed and his gun was left at the scene or used during the commission of a crime in which the gun was left behind. >> jon: okay. [laughter] so our plan to prevent american guns from being used in mexican gang violence is to provide mexican gangs american guns. [laughter] to use according to our plan. [laughter] how exactly did we convince the mexican government to cooperate
[laughter] >> jon: jon stewart, "the daily show." i have a quick question. as a frequent radioshack customer, i may be qualified to tell you what may be an issue with your plan, but go ahead. >> the problem with it was the limited battery life. [laughter and applause] >> jon: see, the batteries at radioshack are designed to work with one of those little remote control helicopters that work... once. [laughter] so now that we know the g.p.s. tracking system for the...
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Jul 20, 2011
07/11
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last night by the way on "the daily show," jon stewart giving us his own take. take a look. >> the whole day of testimony was amazing. but perhaps no moment more remarkable than murdoch interrupting his son's opening statement. >> of the newspaper -- >> before you get to that, i'd just like to say one sentence. this is the most humble day of my life. >> not so humble you couldn't wait for your turn to talk. by the way, that was before some idiot tried to pie murdoch. the young woman in pink whose lightning reflex and devastating chuck norrisesque hand speed subdues him. that woman is rupert murdoch's wife, wendy. now, i'm not a big proponent of the four decade marriage age gap. but if ever there was a situation where it would pay dividends, it would be an ambush like that. of course the attack occurred after a period of the testimony where murdoch may have appeared somewhat vulnerable. asleep. what? what happened? >>> still ahead, why are you awake? your texts, e-mails, coming up next. morning joe moments away. you know when something's bad -- but you do it anyw
last night by the way on "the daily show," jon stewart giving us his own take. take a look. >> the whole day of testimony was amazing. but perhaps no moment more remarkable than murdoch interrupting his son's opening statement. >> of the newspaper -- >> before you get to that, i'd just like to say one sentence. this is the most humble day of my life. >> not so humble you couldn't wait for your turn to talk. by the way, that was before some idiot tried to pie...
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Jul 12, 2011
07/11
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stewart -- the daily show with jon stewart. (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: hey, welcome to the show. my name is jon stewart. boom! we got a good one for you tonight. tonight's guest, dennis leary will be joining us on the program. (cheers and applause) >> jon: monday denis leary, thursday sergeant first class leroy petry who is going to be receiving the medal of honor, one of the only living members of the military to receive it since the vietnam war, leary on monday, maeld of honor winner on thursday. it will be, the largest character gap we have ever had. (laughter) >> between guests. denis was wondering how i was going to get him today. anyway, took last week off. and had a great vacation. went away completely unplugged. no news, no tv, threw my cell phone in the ocean which caused some problems later but at the time felt pretty great. so let's plug back in, what i did miss? >> the president is worrying that we have just nine days to raise the debt ceiling or risk default. >> the numbers
stewart -- the daily show with jon stewart. (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: hey, welcome to the show. my name is jon stewart. boom! we got a good one for you tonight. tonight's guest, dennis leary will be joining us on the program. (cheers and applause) >> jon: monday denis leary, thursday sergeant first class leroy petry who is going to be receiving the medal of honor, one of the only living members of the military to receive it since the...
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Jul 28, 2011
07/11
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my name is jon stewart. good show tonight! we got a nice one for you tonight. our guest tonight, npr's juan williams will be joining us. (cheers and applause) really? he's not there anymore? (laughter) well, i'll definitely ask him about that. (laughter) but we begin, of course, with our ongoing national crisis. (laughter and applause) one week, ladies and gentlemen, for our two parties to agree to raise the country's arbitrary debt limit for the 102nd time for the drop-dead august 2 catastrophic ultimatum we've already moved twice. (laughter) and so it was under these conditions that president barack obama interrupted a bachelorette's search for love... (laughter). ... to take that long walk down "we killed bin laden" lane. >> tonight i want to talk about the debate we've been having in washington over the national debt. >> jon: the debate we've been having? (laughter) is that what that noise out of washington's been? it sounded like an a elephant seal trying to (bleep) a truck! (laughter) actually, that footage is from a few years ago. the two of them are ver
my name is jon stewart. good show tonight! we got a nice one for you tonight. our guest tonight, npr's juan williams will be joining us. (cheers and applause) really? he's not there anymore? (laughter) well, i'll definitely ask him about that. (laughter) but we begin, of course, with our ongoing national crisis. (laughter and applause) one week, ladies and gentlemen, for our two parties to agree to raise the country's arbitrary debt limit for the 102nd time for the drop-dead august 2...
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stewart now has the bull's eye on his back. >> jon stewart says he is both liberal and fair. is he really? >> did jon stewart mock republican presidential candidate herman cane because he's a black man? >> he gets away with one sided attacks. are. >> jon stewart needs a lessen on truth telling. >> kerimen -- herman cain says that he was mocking him. >> i guess everyone got the memo. >> he did make fun of him in an an amos and andy voice i found unis thing but he did a lot of
stewart now has the bull's eye on his back. >> jon stewart says he is both liberal and fair. is he really? >> did jon stewart mock republican presidential candidate herman cane because he's a black man? >> he gets away with one sided attacks. are. >> jon stewart needs a lessen on truth telling. >> kerimen -- herman cain says that he was mocking him. >> i guess everyone got the memo. >> he did make fun of him in an an amos and andy voice i found unis...
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Jul 29, 2011
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jon stewart picked up on all of it with chuck schumer. >> the democratic response to the republicans use of that clip from the movie the town did lead to one of my favorite recent moments on cable news. i give you chuck schumer's movie break down show. >> in the scene, they chose to inspire their house freshmen, one of the crooks gives a pep talk to the other right before they both put on hockey masks, bludgeon two men with sticks, and shoot a man in the leg. >> join us next week when i, chuck assume, revishu schumer, i classic the star wars. in this film, a large asthmatic man dressed in black plastic cuts the arm off of a boy wearing pajamas with some type of a glow stick. and here's the part you won't believe. the man in the suit is the boy's father. >> pretty good summary. still ahead on "way too early," why are you awake? tweets, texts and e-mails are next. emily's just starting out... and on a budget. like a ramen noodle- every-night budget. she thought allstate car insurance was out of her reach. until she heard about the value plan. and saving money with allstate doesn't stop
jon stewart picked up on all of it with chuck schumer. >> the democratic response to the republicans use of that clip from the movie the town did lead to one of my favorite recent moments on cable news. i give you chuck schumer's movie break down show. >> in the scene, they chose to inspire their house freshmen, one of the crooks gives a pep talk to the other right before they both put on hockey masks, bludgeon two men with sticks, and shoot a man in the leg. >> join us next...
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Jul 1, 2011
07/11
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jon stewart, here's jon stewart at the grammys or emmys or whatever they give for television. i don't know because i'll never win one, but here he is with his writers. he's got 15 writers for this segment. i believe he's had as many as 40 writers. he uses these writers for six minutes of television and a total of 22 minutes a night. whoa. i want to bring in my writers, bring them all in because we have never seen them. can you bring them? bring them in. oh, here they are. dan and pat. hi, dan. hi, pat. see. its easy to speak from the heart. its easy to do things when you actually believe them. we've done it with a remarkably small and dedicated staff and remarkably large and dedicated audience and we thank you for that. >> glenn: my whole world has changed because of the time we spend together every day at 5:00, this is the last program. i want to show you little things that because we've met, things change. holding money. if i -- i wouldn't have said this two and a half years ago. i look at this one, ben franklin. abolitionists. willing to go looking crazy, go to his grave lo
jon stewart, here's jon stewart at the grammys or emmys or whatever they give for television. i don't know because i'll never win one, but here he is with his writers. he's got 15 writers for this segment. i believe he's had as many as 40 writers. he uses these writers for six minutes of television and a total of 22 minutes a night. whoa. i want to bring in my writers, bring them all in because we have never seen them. can you bring them? bring them in. oh, here they are. dan and pat. hi, dan....
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Jul 14, 2011
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my name is jon stewart. we've got a good one for you tonight. my guest tonight author matthew richardson. he is author of a book about fannie mae and freddy imagine and -- freddie mac and why the two shu never have gotten married. republican michel bachmann has surged above president obama. the key to the success progrowth agenda, adherence to the founding fathers principles and something special. >> analysts say her uncompromising views on homosexuality are one of big reasons she's gaining traction in iowa. >> jon: what? why would iowans be so concerned about what happens three inches below the corn belt? [laughter] since the iowa supreme court legalized same-sex marriage in 2009 they've noticed real changes in the state's cash crop! [laughter] yes, their worst fears corn destroyed by a (bleep) playing. [laughter] a -- (bleep) plague. movie about iowa field of -- if you build it they will -- you know. [laughter] it's no surprising the message is resonating to conservatives there. unless you think she's pandering rest april sured she's be on thi
my name is jon stewart. we've got a good one for you tonight. my guest tonight author matthew richardson. he is author of a book about fannie mae and freddy imagine and -- freddie mac and why the two shu never have gotten married. republican michel bachmann has surged above president obama. the key to the success progrowth agenda, adherence to the founding fathers principles and something special. >> analysts say her uncompromising views on homosexuality are one of big reasons she's...
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Jul 22, 2011
07/11
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from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show with jon stewart." captioning sponsored by comedy central [theme song playing] [applause] >> jon: welcome to "the daily show." boom. got a good one for you tonight. we got a good one for you tonight. i is jon stewart. our guest tonight, focus, boy, focus, our guest tonight steve carell for... [laughter] anyway, i look forward to meeting the young man. our top story, of course, tonight, once again, the continuing revelation in the british tabloid "news of the world" scandal. as you may recall, yesterday news corp owner montgomery burns was called before parliament for a dramatic three-hour testimony so intense the media mogul managed to stay awake. [laughter] he managed to stay awake for nearly all of it. >> this is the most humble day of my life. >> jon: 'tis true. for nearly 80 years rupert murdoch has had, for lack of a better term, the "run of the planet." dominion over all that he surveys. but yesterday, july 19, in the year of our murdoch 2011, was the day that the aussie iconoclast had to accept t
from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show with jon stewart." captioning sponsored by comedy central [theme song playing] [applause] >> jon: welcome to "the daily show." boom. got a good one for you tonight. we got a good one for you tonight. i is jon stewart. our guest tonight, focus, boy, focus, our guest tonight steve carell for... [laughter] anyway, i look forward to meeting the young man. our top story, of course, tonight,...
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also cashing in the perfect time to roll out my new jon stewart brand tuxedos. all the elegance of a tuxedo but with the flattering physique. >> (cat yowling). >> jon: indeed. fray fry's decision brings the total number of states permitting gay marriage to 7. 41 other states still have laws on the books explicitly banning same sex marriage. it's why many gay activists are looking for federal action to achieve national marriage equality. last thursday barack obama addressed that very question. >> i have long believed that the so-called defense of marriage act ought to be repealed. >> jon: hear, hear, yeah! i assume the president's problem with the defense of marriage act is that it should be a federal law in support of gay marriage. >> part of the reason that doma doesn't make sense is that traditionally marriage has been decided by the states. (audience groaning). >> jon: really? the gentleman with mixed race parents playing the states no best card. you know, when i was born... ( cheers and applause ) when i was born my parents' marriage would have been illegal
also cashing in the perfect time to roll out my new jon stewart brand tuxedos. all the elegance of a tuxedo but with the flattering physique. >> (cat yowling). >> jon: indeed. fray fry's decision brings the total number of states permitting gay marriage to 7. 41 other states still have laws on the books explicitly banning same sex marriage. it's why many gay activists are looking for federal action to achieve national marriage equality. last thursday barack obama addressed that very...
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Jul 28, 2011
07/11
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my name is jon stewart. we have a good one for you tonight. we have put together a program for you tonight that i think will delight and entertain. my guest rachel weisz here to talk about her new film. [cheering and applause] her new film is called "the whistleblower." it's about a young girl who finds a whistle. [laughter] i don't want to give away the rest. [laughter] she blows the whistle. she ultimately blows the whistle. but let's begin tonight in norway. obviously what norway's going through right now is just awful. people are upset, angry, outraged, although some people's upset, anger and outrage, at least in this country, extends into areas that may surprise you. >> why is the liberal press playing up the christian angle in the norway shooting case? >> the mainstream media was quick to portray the suspect as a christian extremist. >> they lay down this narrative every time there's a psychoout there. he's a fundamentalist christian that. is not the case absolutely at all. >> they quickly labeled him christian when there's nothing relig
my name is jon stewart. we have a good one for you tonight. we have put together a program for you tonight that i think will delight and entertain. my guest rachel weisz here to talk about her new film. [cheering and applause] her new film is called "the whistleblower." it's about a young girl who finds a whistle. [laughter] i don't want to give away the rest. [laughter] she blows the whistle. she ultimately blows the whistle. but let's begin tonight in norway. obviously what norway's...
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Jul 15, 2011
07/11
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. >>> and jon stewart has to bring in an expert to help him pray the gay jokes away. naturals from purina cat chow. delicious, real ingredients with no artificial flavors or preservatives. naturals from purina cat chow. share a better life. [ male announcer ] the davis twins... ...are alike in nearly every way... ...right down to brushing their teeth. so how did only one get gingivitis? well, one in two people do. so i told karen about new crest pro-health clinical gum protection toothpaste. it helps eliminate plaque at the gumline, helping prevent gingivitis. it's even clinically proven to help reverse it in just 4 weeks. and it protects these other areas dentists check most. looks like the twins are even again. new crest pro-health clinical toothpaste. life opens up when you do. >>> so the whitey bulger case is a federal case. so there's one guy who is hoping for a federal government shutdown so they can't bring him to trial and the prosecutors don't get paid. >>> still to come tonight, senator ted kennedy's campaign team from 1994 found a way to stop mitt romney co
. >>> and jon stewart has to bring in an expert to help him pray the gay jokes away. naturals from purina cat chow. delicious, real ingredients with no artificial flavors or preservatives. naturals from purina cat chow. share a better life. [ male announcer ] the davis twins... ...are alike in nearly every way... ...right down to brushing their teeth. so how did only one get gingivitis? well, one in two people do. so i told karen about new crest pro-health clinical gum protection...
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Jul 29, 2011
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is jon stewart, man! do we have a good show for you tonight. tonight's guest peter tomsen, author of a new book "the wars of afghanistan" that's right, plural, wars. as you know, debt ceiling discussions, coming down to the wire. political leaders on both sides pulling out all the stops. all the stops. like the kind of stops that high school football coaches use before homecoming games in particular at thiscious small towns. >> kevin mccarthy a third ranking republican in the house urged republicans to unite behind boehner's plan by showing this clip from the movie "the town" >> the town? (laughter) "the town", no rudy-- "rudy" "brian song" or "300" or "rocky" or "rocky 2" or "rocky 3" or really any of the "rockies" you went with the boston bank rubbers in nun costumes clip. >> well, there is going to be good. (laughter) let's see the clip-- (cheers and applause) >> that the republicans used, let's see the clip that the republicans used to urge their hard line tea party freshman coalition to drop their ob
is jon stewart, man! do we have a good show for you tonight. tonight's guest peter tomsen, author of a new book "the wars of afghanistan" that's right, plural, wars. as you know, debt ceiling discussions, coming down to the wire. political leaders on both sides pulling out all the stops. all the stops. like the kind of stops that high school football coaches use before homecoming games in particular at thiscious small towns. >> kevin mccarthy a third ranking republican in the...
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Jul 15, 2011
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my name is jon stewart. we have a very special show, very special guest tonight. medal of honor recipient sergeant first class leroy petry will be joining us on the program tonight. we're honored. we begin tonight, of course, with the looming crisis. as you know, on august 2nd, if america fails to raise the debt ceiling, we default on our debt. people lose the capacity to love. [laughter] and animals lose the capacity to lick their own genitals. that's right. if we don't raise the debt ceiling on august 2nd, man will be sentenced to an eternity of licking our own pet's genital, because what would we really do? let them dry out? of course not. [laughter] so hopefully our president, barack obama, can in one swift rooseveltian "we have nothing to fear but fear itself" moment ease the american psychoi can. >> can you tell the folks at home that no matter what happens the social security checks will go out on august 3rd. >> i cannot guarantee that those checks go out on august 3rd if we haven't resolved this issue because there may simply not be the money in the coffer
my name is jon stewart. we have a very special show, very special guest tonight. medal of honor recipient sergeant first class leroy petry will be joining us on the program tonight. we're honored. we begin tonight, of course, with the looming crisis. as you know, on august 2nd, if america fails to raise the debt ceiling, we default on our debt. people lose the capacity to love. [laughter] and animals lose the capacity to lick their own genitals. that's right. if we don't raise the debt ceiling...